Thursday, March 13, 2008

I need an eye exam

Our new couches arrived on Tuesday. I finally got around to removing the hanging tags from them today. One of the tags is a "WARNING: FLAMMABLE" tag. I really need my eyes examined, because I thought bullet point number 3 said, "Keep children away from machetes and lighters." It says "matches," but machetes is much funnier. I suppose I should return Nyssa's Easter gift back to Machetes R Us!

For some reason, the name "TAMMY" is stamped on the WARNING:FLAMMABLE tag. I'm not sure why. It doesn't say, "Inspected by," or "For a good time, call" or anything.

Junk mail amuses me. Pizza Hut's latest flyer is advertising "The Natural." It has a multi-grain crust, sauce made from organic tomatoes, and (this is the one that gets me) ALL-NATURAL mozzarella cheese. That scares me a little. I mean, what is the mozzarella cheese on their regular, non-all-natural, pizzas made from, if it's not ALL NATURAL??? What does unnatural cheese look like? Actually, I think I know the answer to that one - it's in the form of veggie cheese slices made from tofu. I'm not knocking tofu products masquerading as dairy products, in fact, I am a big fan of the Tofutti products, specifically the Cuties (ice "cream" sandwiches), and the Better than Cream Cheese and Better than Sour Cream dairy substitutes. But veggie cheese still strikes me as unnatural.

1 comment:

April said...

Don't forget Cheese in a Tube=definitely NOT natural!